The People's Republic of Sourus Kale is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Kaleb with an iron fist, and notable for its pith helmet sales, smutty television, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 6.332 billion Sourus Kaleans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kale. The average income tax rate is 78.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Sourus Kalean economy, worth 916 trillion dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Gambling, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 144,711 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Parents are fined for sending their children to take out the trash after sunset, God took rock and roll from you, took rock and roll from everyone, there's a bright dawn ahead for Sourus Kale, and children aren't allowed to chew their pencils until they get home from school. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Sourus Kale's national animal is the kale snail, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Chaos.

Sourus Kale is ranked 207,851^st in the world and 13^th in Romania for Safest, scoring 35.54 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.